Tissues.

Colds.

I have a box of tissues in my bedroom, on my night stand.

For some reason I forget that they are there.

I have  a cold right now.

I decide to use toilet paper, to blow my  nose instead of tissues.

Above my lip burns as if I put habanero  pepper juice on as lip gloss.

.The tissues have been sitting there for a year. 

Still full of tissues.

Before I even got the tissues, I wished that I had them. Now that I have them I don't use them. 

What the hell Isla...

What the hell.

Tears.

When I cry, I use tissues no problem.

Not the tissues in my room though. 

I run upstairs to the living room, where there is a box of tissues on the little coffee table.

That one is now empty. 

What the hell Isla...

What the hell.

Different

i like being different. i like standing out. 

Let me misspell ...TRIANCHULA....TARANCHULA...TARANTULA. let me draw a sun that looks stoned, in peace.

please don't judge me judgers. 

if you do, i suppose that's fine. 

i'm just showing you the weird, awkward side of me. i don't normally show it. 

its different.  

I drew this a couple weeks ago.

 I

     think 

I was

CONFUSED?

Thats not different for me though. 

"You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there's still going to be somebody who hates peaches. "

-Dita Von Teese.

                          

Fail

I get itchy when I am stressed.

I am itchy right now. 

Why am I stressed? Because I don't know what to say in this blog post.

I could write about a goldfish?

I could write about a white picket fence?

I could write about dull red colored pencils?

But no. I am dull myself. 

I can't create something artsy out of those things.Or maybe I could, but it would be off the charts weird. 

Truth is I could write about a ton of things, but I just don't know if I should keep it to myself.

I don't know if this should be my journal, where I open up completely about my every thought, or if I should keep that for my journal hidden in my underwear drawer.

I don't know if I was getting anywhere with this... I started it, then stopped, take a look. 

Moldy flowers

I have flowers in my room.

Flowers from past school dances.

Flowers from boys who wanted to show they care.

Flowers from my parents, after dance recitals.

these flowers are now sitting in the corner in my room, dying away. Dying like the memories.... 

Epic fail. Rest in peace to these words that have no life or impact in them. 

I guess it was a good start to something, I just feel boring, therefore I didn't want to continue with that. 

I admire those of you in Paris. I admire the fact that you are able to make your words art. I admire that  you can share things from your brain, and have it be beautiful.

Thank you for your beautiful typed words.

I will come around, I am still in the airport to get to Paris, the flight is just delayed. 

-Isla Kirie 

LOVE

If you are hoping for the definition of love here, please make your own. 

Mine is still pending.

Also trying to explain it gives me a migraine. 

I am as confused as you are.

I almost said "I love you," to him tonight. 

I almost did. I was so close. So close in fact that "I-" slipped off my tongue. A quick, "I-iiii can't wait to see you tomorrow," was my way to escape. 

Saying those three simple words would make me feel too vulnerable. 

Why couldn't I say it?

I felt ready, but is love something you need to be prepared for?

Damn.

I 

Like

yOu

Very

E....much

You

wOnderful

hUman...

...Is basically what love stands for, if you think about it. 

Simple right?

No way, crazy.

I say I love you to my family, and best friends, so why on earth can't I say it to you? 

 You wonderful human.

You are just there, not judging, just being you, with those eyes. 

That's what I love about you. 

Saying "I love you," is not like counting to 3, unless its to your family. Saying it to your significant other however,  is like counting to a billion; difficult. Just stop at 1. 

My heart and brain have been in competition with one another. I think that they are in a tie. 

Not only does my heart want to say I love you, but my brain as well.

So, that's cool I guess. 

-Isla Kirie

Laugh about it silly, its good for you.

Wake up each day and know you made it to the next one.

Giggle at the smallest things, laugh about dropping your phone on your face. With all your might fully force a laugh so powerful when you stumble over your feet, even if your are embarrassed, laugh silly its good for you. Laughing is positive, in fact, so positive, people can  see an array of light. The light is so bright, that it makes them happy as well. What an amazing thing, to have such power in your face. 

We don't laugh as much as we should. I do believe if we actually laughed out loud, the world can make it through an apocalypse. Truth. 

Crayons

I miss being young.

I miss the pulling of my hair from the lavender purple brush, the struggle my parents went through to get my hair brushed.

I miss getting called from the playground, to come get a bologna sandwich. There was just something about having lunch without knowing it was lunch time. Time really does fly when you’re having fun.

The way I would wake up in my bed, even though I clearly fell asleep on the floor.

How losing a tooth was the best thing that could ever happen to you. I couldn’t wait for the tooth fairy.

I miss my floor being covered with furry stuffed animals and Barbie dolls.  

I miss the free lip gloss.

Getting ready for afternoon preschool was always fun. Mom would be at work, and dad would braid my hair. I felt like a princess.

I wish I could go back to my creativity, it wasn’t disturbed from all the many things that you notice when you are older.

I miss blasting Enya with my mom, and pretending we were ballerinas.

I miss when crying was over someone not sharing, not over emotions and shit.

Learning things was never stressful; I just appreciated being surrounded by kids my age to play with.

When Kool-Aid, was THE drink to drink.

When the opposite sex had “Cooties”.

I miss when the family spent time together; we are now starting to drift; college, marriage, etc.  

I miss when strangers would complement me with the, “she is so cutes’”.

Oh, how much I miss when the tests were as simple as 1+1.

Now I am 17.

Life has a way to just freak me the hell out. I guess I am excited for what the future has in store, but until then….life will just stay a mystery.

Let me be young again, give me some damn crayons. 

Just happy is all...

I really wish that I could be deep on this post, deep meaning: big words,  sentence structures longer than each thoughts life span. But I just can't get myself to do so.

Today I woke up excited, refreshed and enthused. 

I'm happy.

Well I mean, I guess you could say I am happy a lot, but today I just want to give my happy thoughts extra attention.

Happiness is a power that I think people are afraid of. 

For some reason we like to focus on negativity just to say that we feel. 

I do that often. 

I wish I had the answers as to why, but oh well. 

Being happy doesn't necessarily have to mean that you smile all day everyday, or that you compliment everyone on their shoes (in my opinion). It means a variety of other things.
 Everyone's definition of happiness is different. 
My definition I can't really explain, but I am feeling pure bliss today. 
Here is a list of some things that put a smile on my face:
Waking up on time/cold glass of water/ pretty teeth/ burps/nail polish/laughable laughs/money/shopping/grades above a b/ goldfish/ whales/ ocean/awesome ass handshakes/ nice people/ oranges/ strawberries/ mountains/ Seattle/ music: all kinds/ looking back at birthday cards/ writing thank you cards/ charging my phone/ painting/ making strangers laugh/dogs/ cats/ birds/ new shoes/ groceries/ food that looks exactly like the advertisements/ when other people like a song I show them/ receiving Build-a-Bears/ Christmas morning/ 4th of July/ boating/ water/ good hair days/ I wonder if you are still reading if so...lets continue/ Happy vibes from people/ hugs/ new deodorant/ cool names/ donating blood/ adopting animals/ new blankets/ completed homework/ just the right amount of chew in chewy cookies/ sandwiches that take way too much effort/ flowers/ random notes/ cleaning my car/ cleaning my room/ taking pictures/ coloring/ rings/ rain/ snow/ heat/ long lasting conversations/ tea/ socks/trips/ success/ mall/teal/ 
You get it I am sure. Well have a good day everyone i'm going to go paint my nails now. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgKslXz30U0